Adventures From The Bedrooms Of African Women

(De)Centering The D

August 1, 2022

With society’s traditionally binary views on gender, so much of what it means to be a ‘man’ is tied to the omnipotent power and performance of the penis. So, when Malaka and Nana Darkoa decided to explore the topic of dicks and masculinity, they expected the usual ‘size matters’ arguments to come through. 

But, they soon learned that BDE may not actually have much to do with what’s in your pants. This episode gets a surprising take from a range of cis and trans men, as well as a gender non-conforming person, as they share their fears and feelings about masculinity, performance, and pleasure. 

Writer and poet Nii Ayikwei Parkes has some wise words for men and women whose sex lives center the D. “It's not a machine,” he says. “If that's what's going to define your happiness in a sexual encounter, then you are never going to be happy.”

Malaka Grant and Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah host the Adventures From the Bedrooms of African Women Podcast. Frederica Boswell is the Senior Producer. Fatima Derby is our Associate Producer. Written by Wana Udobang. Audio editors are Mercy Barno and Tevin Sudi. Malaka Grant and Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah are Executive Producers.

The Adventures From the Bedrooms of African Women Podcast is a production of AQ Studios in partnership with Masi Media. Mercy Githaiga is our studio administrator and Selly Thiam is the AQ Studios CEO. 

Our theme music is Damn by Ria Boss and music from this episode comes from Bluedot Sessions.

Find Adventures From the Bedrooms of African Women anywhere you get your podcasts, and in pursuing all things sex, sexuality, and pleasure, follow us on all our social media platforms @adventuresfrom.

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